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Christopher Lee  

  • Status: Member
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  • Male/Australia
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  • Deviant since Jul 11, 2003, 7:33 AM
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  • 316 Deviation Comments
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Journal Entry: Wed Apr 26, 2006, 5:48 AM
I have decided that I am not going to read another article discussing about intellectuals or anything that is intellectually stimulating. I have had enough and my brain has exploded from the sheer pressure of trudging through verbose bogs. And that, my friend, is never a good thing.

I am also at a crossroad. I have worked long and rather hard at making Richard Sommer - now Joseph Stokes - a functional story, but I think I might have ran out of steam and I might just have complicated things by starting off with an expectation. I know some of you will just glower at me and say that I never finish my story, but the truth is I did already, just that I am not satisfied with it hence the second version of the story - yes, there is a second version of that dreaded series. But I am just tired and I can't seem to make it work no matter what.

Just for statistics, for Richard Sommer, I have in mind at maximum 6 chapters, and of the original story, I collapsed chapter 2 and 3 together to produce Veterans, which I have to say I am quite happy with. The two version I am working with now scrapped the entire third chapter - 'A Burnt Shell' - and started anew from thereon. It was rather smooth sailing until the midpoint of the fourth chapter, the very point where I am stuck at now. So far, I have drafted that chapter twice, but neither one works well and I am really dreading to work on it. In fact, I am beginning to believe that the entire story is a flop; I am not going anywhere with it despite working on it.

But such is life.

Some of you are members of so hence you know what inspired the Ararchnophilia theme. I don't hate the little things, but I don't really love them too.

So what happened to Charlotte? (I kept thinking Phoebe, but Phoebe is a sea flea who lived in a teepee that doubles as a heehee serving freebies so that is another story altogether).

---------------------------

Redbacks: Neutralising the threat in the bathroom. A proposal of action.

Introduction

The Black Widow spider (Genus Latrodectus) frequently occurs in disturbed habitats in Australia (Random name, Random year). The spider is extremely adaptable to the changing environment and has since recolonised much of its former habitats lost to the urban sprawl of Melbourne (Personal observation). As such, there has been many confrontations with the venomous spider in suburban households (Mr X., 2006a).

Known for its fatality rate of 0.1%, the redback's neurotoxin is <insert long and boring clinical description here so as to mark up the total word count to 1,500 words. In short, it would be just> deadly. <Continue with long and boring account of the neurotoxin. All you need to know is this: it is boring, but dangerous.> (Random name II,Random year II)

Our aim in this study is to standardise a method of neutralising the threat of the redback (read: KILL THE DAMN BUGGER) in the common household. Blah blah blah blah. <Add more blahs to satisfy your hunger for blahs>

Methods

The bathroom is of a small to medium sized bathroom. It is a normal toilet equipped with a washing machine, a dryer and a shower stall. The shower stall itself is furnished with a bottle of Herbal Essence shampoo and a bar of Cussons Imperial Leather soap in the soap dish. There is also an Orange scented Shokubutsu showering liquid in a basket on the floor. But they are inconsequential.

The spider is on the edge of the sink.

<So I will digress here to talk about the model of the dryer and the washing machine and their make, and how often we use it, along with the types of washing detergents before going back to point on saying>

The spider is on the edge of the sink.
And her name is Charlotte. She told me so.

<Omission: I jumped up, cleaned up, splashed water onto the spider, shot shaving cream at her, sprayed hand soap and watch her scuttle into a crack behind the sink. I then ran out and got Mr. X and returned with the backup.>

The spider was then surrounded by a variety of aerosol insecticides, which were quickly put to the test. <Omission: Mr. X and I were armed with 3 insecticides between us. We then filled every nook and cranny of the toilet with insecticide mist.>

<Omission: Mr. X then went on a spider crusade throughout the entire house, depleting one can of aerosol.>

Results

There was no Charlotte to be found and the result was found to be significant (t=-19.89, df=0, p<0.01). <Omission: I was informed that my housemate later nearly died in the toilet. Also, we found daddy longlegs dangling from every possible corner we could find. Mr. X omnipotent insecticide did it.>

Discussion

We can draw several conclusions from the results. The first is that we had subjected the toilet to a sufficient level of insecticide potency as to affect human beings <omission: it is either that or my housemate is as I had suspected, a cockroach> and therefore adequately neutralised the redback's threat. The second is that insecticides smell funny because they have funny pictures of mosquitoes and ants on it (Personal observations). The third would be Mr. X has good insecticides (Mr. X, 2006b).

Reference

Mr. X, 2006a, 'Lecture on how to deal with unfavourable intruders (read: GODDAMN INSECTS)', unpublished.

Mr. X, 2006b, 'I have good insecticides!', unpublished.

Random name, Random year, 'The Random Algorithm', Random House, Random

Random name II, Random year II, 'Something that is related', unwritten.

----------

Don't ask. It has been a crazy week.

Balhaza is :reading::

    :bulletred:Quicksilver - Neal Stephenson
    :bulletred:Great Expectations - Charles Dickens

    Read
    :bulletblue:Deadeye Dick - Kurt Vonnegut
    :bulletblue:Catch-22 - Joseph Heller
    :bulletblue:Truckers - Terry Pratchett
    :bulletblue:The Madman's Tale - John Katzenbach
    :bulletblue:American Gods - Neil Gaiman
    :bulletblue:The Book of the New Sun: Shadow and Claw - Gene Wolfe
    :bulletblue:The Reunion - Sue Walker
    :bulletblue:Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
    :bulletblue:Shadowmarch by Tad Williams
    :bulletblue:Written in Red - Todd Keisling
    :bulletblue:Dune - Frank Herbert
    :bulletblue:The Burglar who liked to quote Kipling - Lawrence Block
    :bulletblue:Neverwhere - Neil Gaiman
    :bulletblue:Brave New World - Aldour Huxley

    To be read
    :bulletred:Geomancer - Ian Irving
    :bulletred:The Chronicles of Thomas Convenant, the Unbeliever - Stephen Donaldson
    :bulletred:A Tale of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
    :bulletred:Moby Dick - John Melville
    :bulletred:Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell - Susanna Clarke
    :bulletred:Gormenghast - Mervyn Peake
    :bulletred:Bulfinch's Mythology - Thomas Bulfinch

Devious Information

  • Current Residence: Melbourne: Caulfield
  • Interests: Things that would cost me lifetimes to complete...
  • Favourite band or musician: Yasunori Mitsuda, Do As Infinity, Bump of Chicken
  • Favourite poet or writer: Lawrence Block, Steven Erikson, Tad Williams
  • MP3 player of choice: iPod
  • Favourite game: Xenogears, Xenosaga, Chrno Cross
  • Personal Quote: Don't wait for thngs to happen. Make them.

deviantART Notice

Devious Comments

`alienhead:iconalienhead: Oct 22, 2006, 8:03:11 PM
:poke:

Where are you?

--
Welcome to deviantART, where pretension meets the internet. :w00t:
~moyan:iconmoyan: Sep 22, 2006, 7:14:42 PM Mood: Cat Fight
this emote called 'cat-fight' is cute.

--
~silent studio~
~secret study~
~TakodaVega:iconTakodaVega: Sep 2, 2006, 10:03:59 PM
Come back and see meeeeeeeeeeeeee ;-;

You never post up new stuffs anymore :cries: are you ever gonna write more?!

--
"Hmm, so the god of death has a sense of humor, that or he's senile...or both." ~ Takoda Vega, Tattered Wings

"Good news is always good. Good noose depends on the context." `darkcrescendo
`darkcrescendo:icondarkcrescendo: Sep 1, 2006, 11:23:58 PM
There are photos around the place now. =P

Benedictions!

--
There is no escape from metre; there is only mastery.
- T.S. Eliot 'Reflections on Vers Libre' 1917 [link]
~intangebility:iconintangebility: Aug 27, 2006, 6:27:49 AM
i figured after i basically forced you to sing karaoke at my house, i should at least add my name to your watchers list ;)

--
Carpe Noctem

*EldritchCabal - Go, be inspired, and get to work!
~balhaza:iconbalhaza: Aug 21, 2006, 1:53:38 AM
Nope. I was supposed to do that next year but then I failed my previous English subject hence I do not qualify to take the second year English courses. :(

I do wish to take the creative writing though. It sounds like fun.

--
~Don't wait for things to happen. Make them.~
Sitting on your hands just give you butt sores in the future.
`adrift:iconadrift: Aug 21, 2006, 1:43:45 AM
No, I didn't get around to writing anything for it. Too much time dA surfing :P and keeping up to date with essays. Have you done the creative writing sequence with Chandani?

--
gingerandhoney.blogspot.com

People shouldn't be afraid of their governments; governments should be afraid of their people.

You can't separate fucking and economics.
~balhaza:iconbalhaza: Aug 21, 2006, 1:18:32 AM
I was tempted to... but I had submitted my story to a publisher and I was not too sure if they wanted it until today. Took them 4 months to reject me. :(

How about you?

--
~Don't wait for things to happen. Make them.~
Sitting on your hands just give you butt sores in the future.
`adrift:iconadrift: Aug 20, 2006, 9:03:08 PM
Did you put in a submission for this year's Monash Student Anthology?

--
gingerandhoney.blogspot.com

People shouldn't be afraid of their governments; governments should be afraid of their people.

You can't separate fucking and economics.
~mistseeker:iconmistseeker: Aug 18, 2006, 7:42:21 AM
I've been offline most of August, Chris, either because I had lots of work or because I was on vacation. ;) But you'll see more of me on september.

N.
~balhaza:iconbalhaza: Aug 18, 2006, 12:03:45 AM
I never see you on MSN anymore. :(

--
~Don't wait for things to happen. Make them.~
Sitting on your hands just give you butt sores in the future.
~mistseeker:iconmistseeker: Aug 17, 2006, 10:02:51 AM Mood: Joy
Taadaaaa! Long time no see Chris!

N.
`MinorKey:iconMinorKey: Aug 16, 2006, 4:24:16 AM
Sounds useful - I'm on a friend's computer at the moment, but once we're in our own place and I'm back on firefox I might consider that...

How's uni?

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Read the news!
~balhaza:iconbalhaza: Aug 14, 2006, 12:06:24 AM
Do you use Firefox? Some greasemonkeys create a cute little script to restore the previous information now meshed into the 167 Messages. There are a couple of neat little stuffs too to be found on `doofsmack's page, particularly in his journals. ;)

--
~Don't wait for things to happen. Make them.~
Sitting on your hands just give you butt sores in the future.
`MinorKey:iconMinorKey: Aug 13, 2006, 3:38:05 PM
it's taking some getting used to, I have to say. I don't like how the 'comments' I get are now numbered in with journals and things - I always found it useful to know how many new comments had come in from my front page.

Yeah, I haven't been on MSN much because this isn't my computer so I'm not usually on very long. I'm meeting up with ^adrift on Wednesday in the city. If you have any time this week, note me - if I get a job soon my daytime activities will make it harder for me to catch up.

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Read the news!
~balhaza:iconbalhaza: Aug 13, 2006, 1:25:01 AM
Heyo! I have been hoping that you would pop back up on Msn, but no luck. Anyway, I was a long hiatus from dA and I am still unsure whether I will be back here frequently enough. I agree that we should meet up and I just read that `darkcrescendo might be coming over. ;)

P.S: Still getting used to this new-fangled look. I don't like it that much but I am not complaining :P And the mood button doesn't seem to be working.. hmmm

--
~Don't wait for things to happen. Make them.~
Sitting on your hands just give you butt sores in the future.
`MinorKey:iconMinorKey: Aug 12, 2006, 6:21:57 PM Mood: Content
hey... you still about? I'm back in Melbourne and looking for work. We should catch up.

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Read the news!
`MinorKey:iconMinorKey: Jul 18, 2006, 2:01:24 AM
heyo, long time no speak to.

I'm coming back to Melbourne in about 10 days. Have applied for a position at Monash too...

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Read the news!
~yezi:iconyezi: Jun 23, 2006, 7:42:03 AM
dum dee dum dum.

--
Character is what you are in the dark.
~-winalise-:icon-winalise-: May 19, 2006, 8:01:22 PM
dude!!
it's been a long time since I've seen you!
~balhaza:iconbalhaza: Apr 26, 2006, 8:22:55 PM
:p

--
~Don't wait for things to happen. Make them.~
Sitting on your hands just give you butt sores in the future.
~Luches:iconLuches: Apr 26, 2006, 6:07:29 PM
wahahah so is it going to be a tag war soon?
~balhaza:iconbalhaza: Apr 26, 2006, 5:53:42 PM
I refused to be tagged. Ha!

--
~Don't wait for things to happen. Make them.~
Sitting on your hands just give you butt sores in the future.